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Jill had to think very carefully about this. What on earth would happen if she jumped up and down? Would the earth crumble and swallow her into its depths?
She decided to shout.
What to shout though? The poem didn't say did it?
She tried:
AAARGGGH!!!
Nothing happened.
She tried:
COME ON YOU REDS!!!
Still nothing.
As a final effort she shouted:
WHAT THE BLOOMING HECK SHOULD I BE SHOUTING?
And the loudest, fiercest, earth-shattering voice shouted back:
I DON'T BLOOMING WELL CARE WHAT YOU SHOUT SINCE IT WON'T DO YOU THE SLIGHTEST BIT OF GOOD - HO HO HO!!!!
The voice was so terribly loud and piercing that Jill's eardrums spun round like Catherine Wheels and exploded in all directions. She fell to the ground twitching horribly.
Shall we just say that whoever it was who left the message dined extremely well that night?
Moral: Shouting is not good.